It might seem like spring has come to Helsinki but at work it’s still Christmas. I bought this Poinsettia (Julstjärna) one month before Christmas and, believe it or not, but it’s still blossoming.
When I came back to work after the holidays, I put away all the Christmas decorations I had on my desk – except for the flower. My initial decision to throw it away was met with such protests from my colleagues that I had to let it be. They are already thinking of me as a coldblooded killer from my lack of compassion for all the mice and rats people kill in the name of science. As I didn’t want to feed on their believes I had to let the stupid flower live.
But it just keeps on living. Has it no pride? It’s a Christmas flower! It’s supposed to live for one month tops, and then meet it’s fate and start withering at New Years. But no, this flower has some crazy Daffodil genes and thinks it will survive until it has fulfilled its destiny at Easter.
So it’s just a flower. But think of the Christmas tree. You don’t keep that in the house all year round do you! The flower is somewhat like a office Christmas tree – it has to go!
And I know what you are thinking – Why don’t I just stop watering it. But no, to fool my colleagues it has to be a sudden death. Like the flower was struck by some weird disease.
I’m thinking about using one of all the poisonous substances we have in our lab. Maybe beta-mercaptoethanol. But I guess just regular ethanol would do just fine.
Yes this is my new scheme – the poor little flower will get alcohol poisoning.
Mwahahaha…
